First of all, what is the essence to friendship? I believe that friends are simply people you can depend on when the time comes, people who will take you call in your times of need, people who will support you and believe in you and defend you. This is the heart of friendship, everything else comes with it.
So, the number one secret to creating real friendships is then just this: Be someone that others can depend on. Help others. Help them when they ask and help them when they are too afraid to ask.
Why does this work? Without sounding too cheesy..doing this will make you a better person. You'll be more aware of people's needs and wants when you consciously try to provide value for people. You'll also be able to combat the number one trait that drives people away: selfishness. You'll learn to value other people's situations and realize that their problems are just as real as your own. Having such an attractive personality will in itself attract people to you, which is the foundation of real friendships.
Having the habit of helping others will bring others to you. When people need help or advice, they will come to you. People will always want to be in touch with you because you are someone they want to know.
Now, being willing to help is good, but you do not want to be someone that people take advantage of and throw away when they are done with you. So there are a few other things to do in order to create true friendships.
When you help others, make sure they knows it and need it.
There is nothing wrong with doing good deeds now and then because you are a good person. But if you want to build friendships, you need to be able to create a sense of bliss in others, the bliss that you are in their lives.
Make it two-way
Ask for other people's help! Not only will this make your life easier, it also puts you two on the same level (the level of personal friendship). Every relationship should be a two way process, because this is what makes it grow.
Don't do a good deed and be done with it. This is the foundation of a good friendship, but you can't avoid being social. Chat with people, invite people to hang out, you know the drill. Don't make this a need-based relationship, and don't forget the fun element in every situation.
Hope this article was an interesting read. Leave me a comment, a question, and subscribe!