This is a post I've written a while ago on a different blog. These are very basic principles, and if you master these, you will be able to make a good impression where ever you go. Some points are originally found in Dale Carnegie's book "How to win friends and influence people", which is a great read by the way.
1. To make people like you, you must first show that you like them
The key to getting anyone to like you is to show that you like them. Smile is the easiest and most important thing you can do to show this. Become genuinely interested in people and care about what they say will also do you good. If you are really committed, you can work on this through a deeper level: generosity.
2. First impression - be clean and tidy, don't dress like a slob
It is true. People do judge based on looks. You do too, it is human nature to want to avoid something that is visually unappealing. This is not to say that you have to look like a model to get people to like you, but you have to look clean, smell good, and wear clothes that is the right size.
3. Remember people's names and use it often
Dale Carnegie said "remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language." It shows respect and it makes them feel good. "The steel king" Andrew Carnegie once settled a huge merger just by using his competitor's name to call the new company. President Roosevelt can remember the name of every single person he met. If they do it, why not you? The next time you meet someone new, don't forget to get his/her name!
4. Have a positive attitude to life
A positive attitude attracts people to you. This is because no one wants to be around someone who is negative and who complains all the time. If you can direct your mind to positive things, it will also be easier to fulfil the last two points. When people think of you, what comes to mind? Cheerfulness or negativity? What they associate with you will determine their impression of you.
5. Have a sense of humour
Humour adds colour to life and it's a great addition to a great impression. People will love you if you can make them laugh, without making fun of or sacrificing anyone's reputation. Also, laugh at yourself once in a while if the situation calls. Getting mad over a small joke about you will make you appear small, not to mention the possibilities of others believing that the joke is true.
6. Don't criticise
If you want people to hate you for ten years and more...give them a mean criticism. Everyone is entitled to their own oppinion, and flat out rejecting it is just like saying to that person, "you are stupid." Hold your words and stand in that person's shoes for a moment..who knows, you might learn something.
Leave me a comment and let me know what you think. :)
Showing posts with label Win friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Win friends. Show all posts
The No.1 Secret to creating real friendships
Making friends is not easy. Sure, there are tricks you can use to make people like you or make you more "popular". But this is not what this website is about. Tricks and quick fixes don't work for the long term, and they don't work for what really matters - creating real, lasting friendships.
First of all, what is the essence to friendship? I believe that friends are simply people you can depend on when the time comes, people who will take you call in your times of need, people who will support you and believe in you and defend you. This is the heart of friendship, everything else comes with it.
Why does this work? Without sounding too cheesy..doing this will make you a better person. You'll be more aware of people's needs and wants when you consciously try to provide value for people. You'll also be able to combat the number one trait that drives people away: selfishness. You'll learn to value other people's situations and realize that their problems are just as real as your own. Having such an attractive personality will in itself attract people to you, which is the foundation of real friendships.
Having the habit of helping others will bring others to you. When people need help or advice, they will come to you. People will always want to be in touch with you because you are someone they want to know.
Now, being willing to help is good, but you do not want to be someone that people take advantage of and throw away when they are done with you. So there are a few other things to do in order to create true friendships.
When you help others, make sure they knows it and need it.
There is nothing wrong with doing good deeds now and then because you are a good person. But if you want to build friendships, you need to be able to create a sense of bliss in others, the bliss that you are in their lives.
Make it two-way
Ask for other people's help! Not only will this make your life easier, it also puts you two on the same level (the level of personal friendship). Every relationship should be a two way process, because this is what makes it grow.
Be social
Don't do a good deed and be done with it. This is the foundation of a good friendship, but you can't avoid being social. Chat with people, invite people to hang out, you know the drill. Don't make this a need-based relationship, and don't forget the fun element in every situation.
Hope this article was an interesting read. Leave me a comment, a question, and subscribe!
First of all, what is the essence to friendship? I believe that friends are simply people you can depend on when the time comes, people who will take you call in your times of need, people who will support you and believe in you and defend you. This is the heart of friendship, everything else comes with it.
So, the number one secret to creating real friendships is then just this: Be someone that others can depend on. Help others. Help them when they ask and help them when they are too afraid to ask.
Why does this work? Without sounding too cheesy..doing this will make you a better person. You'll be more aware of people's needs and wants when you consciously try to provide value for people. You'll also be able to combat the number one trait that drives people away: selfishness. You'll learn to value other people's situations and realize that their problems are just as real as your own. Having such an attractive personality will in itself attract people to you, which is the foundation of real friendships.
Having the habit of helping others will bring others to you. When people need help or advice, they will come to you. People will always want to be in touch with you because you are someone they want to know.
Now, being willing to help is good, but you do not want to be someone that people take advantage of and throw away when they are done with you. So there are a few other things to do in order to create true friendships.
When you help others, make sure they knows it and need it.
There is nothing wrong with doing good deeds now and then because you are a good person. But if you want to build friendships, you need to be able to create a sense of bliss in others, the bliss that you are in their lives.
Make it two-way
Ask for other people's help! Not only will this make your life easier, it also puts you two on the same level (the level of personal friendship). Every relationship should be a two way process, because this is what makes it grow.
Be social
Don't do a good deed and be done with it. This is the foundation of a good friendship, but you can't avoid being social. Chat with people, invite people to hang out, you know the drill. Don't make this a need-based relationship, and don't forget the fun element in every situation.
Hope this article was an interesting read. Leave me a comment, a question, and subscribe!
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